DECEMBER 1974

Mud got both the year's Christmas number one and the year's best-selling single in "Tiger Feet" - the Wombles and Ralph McTell both managed to peak at number two in different weeks. The hit version of "Streets Of London" was actually the third recording McTell had made of the song since 1969. The applause at the end of "I Can Help" was in recognition of Billy Swan having performed and compelted the recording while having his ankle being bitten into by a dog which had just run into the studio. "Down Down" gave Status Quo their only UK number one single in a slow week in early January 1975. I caught up with the movie of Stardust many years later and it is indeed pretty scary; the gong effect was achieved by Ray Cooper striking the instrument then immersing it in a bathtub filled with water. Carpet Kingdom was a Scottish carpet warehouse which advertised on STV. Kenny the group were indeed different from Tony Kenny the Irish singer but some sort of deal was engineered where the "brand name" passed on to the band. Showaddywaddy did gain further success in 1975 but realised they'd have to rely on cover versions to do so. Gilbert O'Sullivan's August 1974 single "A Woman's Place" was deemed controversial and sexist, hence received little airplay and peaked at #42; however, O'Sullivan explained that the song was a satirical character study and that if he tried any of that patter with his own wife, he would be the recipient of an almighty thumping.

 

7 December

 

THE TRAMMPS: Zing Went The Strings Of My Heart/Penguin At The Bad Apple (Buddah BDS 405)

Disco version of an old song from the thirties. Well, if that's what people want, here it is (the B-side is just the instrumental backing track).

THE FACES/ROD STEWART: You Can Make Me Dance, Sing Or Anything (Even Take The Dog For A Walk, Mend A Fuse, Fold Away The Ironing Board Or Any Other Domestic Shortcomings.)/As Long As You Tell Him (Warner Bros K 16494)

Their last single and it's a thoroughly good example of how a rock band should work and play together; every element is in place and proportion to every other one. Possibly their best single.

WAYNE GIBSON: Under My Thumb/The Game (Pye Disco Demand DDS 2001)

Wrinkled cover of a horrible old Rolling Stones song. Seems to me like Pye is pushing any old rubbish it has in its attic as a lost Northern Soul classic. Who's in charge, Sid James?

K C & THE SUNSHINE BAND: Sound Your Funky Horn/Why Don't We Get Together (Jay Boy BOY 83)

Fewer hooks than "Queen Of Clubs" but the Miami sound is obviously the way to go, if they can find a way to take it. Solid dancer. 

MUD: Lonely This Christmas/I Can't Stand It (RAK 187)

I guess this is going to be the Christmas number one. Maudlin Elvis-style weepie and it sounds like they're treating loss and loneliness as a joke. This time last year it was Slade. How quickly things change.

 

14 December

 

RINGO STARR: Only You/Call Me (Apple R 6000)

Old Platters song sung like he's in the middle of falling asleep. All this old stuff. Musicians getting old. It can't be healthy.

THE GOODIES: Father Christmas Do Not Touch Me/The Inbetweenies (Bradley's Records BRAD 7421)

"The Inbetweenies" is getting most of the publicity - anaemic comedy Glitter Band takeoff about being the wrong age and not particularly funny. The Father Christmas side is one joke that quickly wears very thin.

BILLY SWAN: I Can Help/Ways Of A Woman In Love (Monument MNT 2752)

Deserved success for this American number one, recorded in a shed with his neighbours by the sound of it but in good spirits with the Woolworths organ and a round of applause at the end.

THE WOMBLES: Wombling Merry Christmas/Madame Cholet (CBS 2842)

I suppose 1974 will go down as the year of Mud and the Wombles. That isn't saying much considering a year ago it was Slade and Wizzard. This is like "Remember You're A Womble" but with Christmas and a wheezing saxophone added.

STATUS QUO: Down Down/Nightride (Vertigo 6059 114)

Back to the fast "Caroline" formula where they sound most comfortable. Should be top five.

RALPH McTELL: Streets Of London/Summer Lightning (Reprise K 14380)

This song seems to have been around forever but is only now getting into the charts, presumably with an eye on the Christmas market. It will do very well - don't think it will get past Mud, but top three is a certainty - but nobody will care about poor people after the New Year.

 

21/28 December (no new chart at Christmas)

 

DAVID ESSEX: Stardust/Miss Sweetness (CBS 2828)

Theme from the sequel to That'll Be The Day which I gather from reviews is very frightening. It's an X certificate so I won't know. This is definitely David Essex at his scariest. Chinese Opera strings and what sounds like a gong being dipped in a watertank. If this were Kevin Coyne or Van Der Graaf Generator everybody would rave about how avant-garde it is.

GLORIA GAYNOR: Never Can Say Goodbye/We Just Can't Make It (MGM 2006 463)

Sounds a bit like the song from the Carpet Kingdom advertisement to me but this is an excellent uptempo disco version of the old Jackson 5 song, very nicely sung.

KENNY: The Bump/Forget The Janes, The Jeans And The Might Have Beens (RAK 186)

Well, if the Rollers didn't want it, the song's obviously been passed on. This is a group and not the same Kenny who did "Heart Of Stone" last year, even though it's the same label. It's confusing, as is the B-side which, despite its name, is dull country-rock.

SHOWADDYWADDY: Hey Mister Christmas/Rock 'N' Roll Man (Bell 1387)

Like their previous two songs but with Christmas and The National Childrens Home Harpenden Choir added. Not Wizzard and the song ends up going nowhere and repeating itself forever until the fade. Not sure we'll be seeing much of them in 1975.

GILBERT O'SULLIVAN: Christmas Song/To Cut A Long Story Short (MAM 124)

He's trying to assure us that he's not very bothered about Christmas, but there's another children's choir. I suppose this is better than his last terrible flop but again I don't think there's much life left in this way of doing things.