APRIL 1974

The fascinating stuff is beginning to outnumber the dubious stuff at this point, although it's clear at this point that if you wanted a hit you put it out on CBS or one of its affiliates - their promotional teams were absolutely "on it." In contrast, Tamla Motown aside, EMI have been rendered nearly invisible and Decca weren't much better, whereas focused labels like Bell and RAK continued to clean up. Incidentally, while listening to the Radio Luxembourg American chart show with Bob Stewart about six months after this, I discovered that Bobby Vinton was enjoying a big hit over there with "My Melody Of Love," the (German) tune of which is identical to that of "Don't Stay Away Too Long" but with a completely different set of lyrics. Make of that what you must.

 

6 April 1974

 

THE CHI-LITES: Homely Girl/I Never Had It So Good (Brunswick BR 9)

Ho-hum ballad about school and looks with stupid Orange March flutes.

 

JIMMY OSMOND: I'm Gonna Knock On Your Door/A Good Ole Mammy Song (MGM 2006 389)

Get stuffed.

SUNNY: Doctor's Orders/It's Only When You're Feeling Lonely (CBS 2068)

One for David Hamilton listeners to clean the kitchen Venetian blinds to before going to the Co-Op because it's all at the Co-Op now, including Dividend Stamps books - you could save up to 49p!

SLADE: Everyday/Good Time Gals (Polydor 2058 453)

Ponderous ballad which not surprisingly didn't go straight in at number one. Doubt it will get there at all, really, even though Luxembourg's playing the heck out of it.

13 April 1974

 

GENESIS: I Know What I Like (In Your Wardrobe)/Twilight Alehouse (Charisma CB 224)

A bit of weird progressive rock with random lyrics about sitting in the garden like John Betjeman on drugs. At least it's not Jimmy Osmond.

LIMMIE AND FAMILY COOKIN': A Walkin' Miracle/Here's Tomorrow (Avco 6105 027)

This is the most stupid record ever made with horses' hooves or something for percussion.

THE WOMBLES: Remember You're A Womble/Bungo's Birthday (CBS 2241)

More singalong than the theme tune so it'll be a bigger hit. Good violin makes it sound like a folk song.

MUD: The Cat Crept In/Morning (RAK 170)

"Tiger Feet" Part 2 but nothing wrong with that, including the false ending. I'm too young to drink but no doubt this will be popular with people who like getting drunk in discotheques because they can stamp their feet and not have to worry about falling over. All that drumming.

 

20 April 1974

 

CHARLIE RICH: Behind Closed Doors/A Sunday Kind Of Woman (Epic EPC 1539)

Country love song. Nice to know he's happy again.

BOWIE: Rock 'N' Roll Suicide/Quicksand (RCA LPBO 5021)

This is an old song and not very pop. It's like a public information film warning you not to take pop music because it might kill you. A bit unnerving, like the Freddie Starr one, but only a bit. Like the end of a stage musical or something. Does he get more? Maybe that's why he wants us to give us our hands. What does he want to do with them, though?

MARVIN HAMLISCH: The Entertainer/Solace (MCA 121)

Ancient Scott Joplin ragtime from The Sting. My piano teacher is already pestering me to learn this but it isn't that difficult.

MUNGO JERRY: Long Legged Woman Dressed In Black/Gonna Bop 'Til I Drop (Dawn DNS 1061)

He looks and sounds like a dirty old man up to no good. Rock and roll isn't Steptoe And Son. 

 

ABBA: Waterloo/Watch Out (Epic EPC 2240)

Not the best Eurovision song this year - that was Italy, of course! - but I suppose it was always going to win. They certainly give it a bit of a Wizzard go but will they just be another Vicky Leandros?

27 April 1974

 

THE THREE DEGREES: Year Of Decision/A Woman Needs A Good Man (Philadelphia International PIR 2073)

Very nice and sumptuous Philly soul dance track. If only Limmie And Family Cookin' had any guts they could be as good as this.

WIZZARD: Rock N' Roll Winter (Loony's Tune)/Dream Of Unwin (Warner Bros K 16357)

You've got to love Roy Wood - putting out a winter song in the middle of spring. Mind you, spring up here in Uddingston looks like winter anyway and we even had some snow the other day so maybe he knows what's what. This isn't as good as the big Wizzard hits, though - doesn't really go anywhere.

STEVIE WONDER: He's Misstra Know It All/You Can't Judge A Book By It's (sic) Cover (Tamla Motown TMG 892)

Another fantastic song from Innervisions which my father tells me is about Richard Nixon. That makes sense.

PETERS AND LEE: Don't Stay Away Too Long/The Old Fashioned Way (Philips 6006 388)

This, however, doesn't make sense. Oompah-oompah-stick-it-up-ya-joompah rubbish you'd expect to hear in Hogan's Heroes. They are better than this but British people just seem to want up-your-jumper chants to sing in pubs when they get drunk on Babycham.